March 18, 2013 Maren

Hey Family,

Wow! This week has been the shortest longest week of my life! By the time Thursday rolled around I could not believe the week was almost over! and then by the time Sunday came it also seemed like it had drug on forever! Funny how time can do that out here. So far I think that it has been moving at a good pace... I don't want it to go any faster or any slower, I just want it to go. 

Can you believe I've already been out for 2 months! Maybe I am crazy but that seems like a long time... 18 months seems so much shorter than 2 years. This mission is going to fly by! That is both good and bad, but like I said, so far I am happy with how time is moving. 

This was possibly the best week I've had here in New York thus far. Why? well because we were busy! Want to know what makes a missionary happy? Being busy! (well that and packages from home but being busy is a big part of it.) 

I'll start on Tuesday since Monday is P-day... we can skip over that. So Tuesday we had sister exchanges. My first ones in the field. Because me and sister Madsen were blinded in we had no idea who was going to stay to work in our area and who was going to go somewhere else, it turned out that I was the one who got to stay. Awesome! But really scary. Why? well because that meant that the appointments were with our investigators and me, being the trainee, was still just trying to get the feel for this thing called missionary work and put the fate of the area in my hands... even for just a day... scary! Want to know what is even scarier...? The sister I was on exchanges with, Sister Jorgansen, she is and English missionary... any and all Spanish was up to me. Yikes!

We switched around noon on Tuesday and we had a day chuck full of appointments to get back to. On the drive home we talked a lot about where we're from, our families, why we were on missions, etc. Everything seemed to just flow. She is from Provo, she's 22 almost 23 and she has been in the mission for about 14 months. As we talked more I found out that she went to Mountain View and I had to ask... "Did you know David Cancilla?" She did. But she didn't know about the accident. I can talk about David all the time and not get very emotional. I love talking about him and especially about all the miracles and tender mercies that surrounded the accident and the days that followed, but telling someone who doesn't know never gets any easier. 

We didn't have too much time to talk about it at that time because we had an appointment to rush off to. This is the 3rd time we've met with this particular investigator and he is awesome. His name is Santos and he is from Honduras. He is really hard to understand because he slurs his words and mumbles... even my companion has a hard time. But he is so ready for the gospel. We found him a few weeks ago knocking doors... on that day I gained my testimony of knocking doors... He already knows a lot of people in the ward so we wanted to take advantage of that and get some awesome member present lessons going, on this day we were going to be meeting with him with Brother Newton, a bilingual man in our ward who had given Santos a ride home one night from a ward activity he'd come to. I was so grateful for the language help.

We met with him at the church. The plan was to do a quick church tour and then watch the Joseph Smith Movie and try to emphasize the significance of the ONE true Church of Jesus Christ. He like many others in the Spanish culture have adopted the belief that it doesn't really matter what church, everyone has to find the path that is right for him. When he got there we ended up really just taking him into the Chapel... there is such a strong spirit in the chapel, it strikes me every time I walk into it. We all felt the spirit so strong. I know that Santos felt it. He started opening up to us and sharing with us part of his life story about when his mom died. He could feel the peace of this place... We just let him talk for a bit and take in the spirit, then we took him into the relief society room for the lesson. 

I did my best to talk about the Book of Mormon, he doesn't know how to read very well so I wanted to make sure that he knew the importance of the Book and remembered some of the things we had talked about. He didn't remember the Restoration story very well so as soon as I figured that out we just watched to movie. I watched Santos just as much as I watched the movie. Throughout it he was nodding his head as if in agreement, smiling, and I don't know, is it possible to look at someone and just know that they are accepting it? Because that was what was happening. When the movie was over all he could say was that he felt that that was true. He believed what had happened. It was cool. Honestly I think I should have asked him to be baptized right then and there, but I was too insecure in the language and in my understanding. 

When I talked to sister Jorgansen about it later she said it was possibly one of the most spiritual lessons she'd even been a part of and she couldn't even understand what was happening throughout most of it. It was a powerful powerful lesson.

As we were eating dinner we talked more about David. There is something so special about talking to someone who knew him! Who knew how amazing he was and the difference that he made in the world! She was on a service committee at school with him for two years. We cried together and talked about the miracles. She told me that in the lesson with Santos that afternoon she had just known that he was there with me. He was there and he was helping me. She knows that he stays close, I know that he does too. Its amazing. Even all the way out here on Long Island I am finding the ripples that He has left behind. He touched so many peoples lives! I am so grateful for the impact that he had on mine.

The next morning we had an amazing study session together. My life was forever changed as a missionary just because of those precious few hours I got to spend with her. People come into our lives for very specific and special purposes, God is there in the details. He orchestrates more than we could ever know.

We talked about many of the Words Elder Holland has spoken to the missionaries over the years. He has said some pretty amazing things. Like that if we need to call down angels, do it! Its like we're saying...
okay! we will go and we will do but if I have to be like Moses and call down plagues and part the red sea you've got to be there, you've got to help me." and you know what elder Holland said, "God will make that deal every time!" So we know that if we do this his way he will back us up... but do we have enough faith to let him? We talk about the power of faith and how it can move mountains but do we really believe it? What is worse is that sometimes we are the ones putting the mountains in our path! I don't know if I am explaining this well at all, but the bottom line is that YES! Faith can move whatever metaphorical mountain may be in our path, even if its one we put there ourselves. He is in this work with us! Here... I don't know if this is quite the same talk but its close.

"Remember above all, that this is a spiritual work. It’s the most important thing you can remember all your life. You cannot have a mission and you will not succeed on this mission and you won’t be happy and you won’t lose your homesickness and you won’t get the language and you won’t be acclimatized to the culture until you give over to God and say, “This is Thy work and I’m only the instrument. I’m on the pencil, but you’ve got to do the writing.” That is the most important thing for a missionary to learn ever. Section 50, a verse you all memorize and I hope you remember all your life, “Unto what you were ordained (or in the case of the sisters, unto what you were set apart by somebody who was ordained), to preach my gospel by the Spirit, even the Comforter, and if it is not taught that way, it is not God’s way.” If it is not taught that way, it is some other way, and any other way is not of God. You can’t do it your own way. Don’t even try. That’s part of the worry—you don’t have to do it, you can’t do it, you shouldn’t do it. Stop worrying that you have to do this. This is God’s work! He will watch you! He will answer your prayers! He has legions of angels and teams of chariots to run to your aid this very hour. He will bless you! This is His work, but you have to do it His way! That’s the contract." - Elder Holland

Bottom line. Faith is powerful! We don't give it enough credit. But it starts with us. My trainer has told me from the beginning that Greenie Faith and work miracles. I've seen it happen and I am determined not to lose it. I will do all I can to maintain my faith in the people and the power of missionary work. I've said it before and I will say it again, Long Island is ready for the gospel, our mission president told us a story this week about the night that he welcomed the newest missionaries to the mission by taking them to the top of the Brooklynner  (my group). He said he took a moment on the roof by himself and as he closed his eyes he could see the city stretched out before him and he could see thousands and thousands of families that are ready to hear the gospel. They are ready! he cried out "How do we find them?" and you know what... its all up to us, the missionaries. Let me explain... they will find us when we are worthy of it. I think there is a saying that goes "when the student is ready the teacher will appear..." well in missionary work its just the opposite. Its "When the teacher is ready the student will appear." We have to be more obedient, we have to gain the trust of the Lord before he will send us his precious Children to teach. We play such a big role in this equation, don't kid yourselves (Mostly talking to Jake and Steph)... More of this is up to us than we can even comprehend. It certainly makes me want to step it up.

O wow... this is going to be a forever long email. Haha, curl up with a blanket because that is still just day 1.

Wednesday was an awesome trainer/trainee meeting at the mission office. When we have to travel into Rego Park a big portion of our day is sucked up in travel time but it is so worth it to hear the inspired words of our Mission President. You can just tell that he is so close to the Spirit. He has a vision for this mission and he is taking us there one step at a time. I am blessed to be here in the time of President Calderwood.

That night we drove strait to a Dinner Appointment we had with two of the coolest women in the ward and Gjina, our investigator who had her baptism scheduled for Sunday. She had been in Michigan all week long so this was the first time we'd seen her in a long long time, we know that the adversary has been working on her so yeah... we were a little apprehensive. But she was amazing as usual! It was so good to be there with these two strong members, One is still a fairly recent convert and so was able to share with Gjina what it was like leading up to her own baptism and how the devil really does work on you extra hard. It was a good night. There was a good spirit there.

The next day was... lets see Thursday. I think that was our busiest day yet in the field. We had 5 appointments scheduled. We had another awesome Member present lesson with Santos. The sister we took with us was Hna Ana. She is a recent convert, the family that we will be going to the temple with at the end of this week. She is so amazingly awesome! She has such a strong testimony and is such a powerful teacher. It was so good, and he is so close... We have hopes to set a baptism date with him soon.

 

Friday was Zone Conference. My first one. That was way cool and super spiritual. The AP's gave workshops on being bolder and working better with member and then the President gave one of becoming students of the Plan of Salvation. In the middle of the Presidents... well... life went crazy! 

We got a text from Gjina saying that she wanted to push her baptism back... potentially for a long long time. I wanted to drop everything and rush to her side. My companion said we had to stay put but we arranged to meet with her right after the conference ended. Right after that she texted again saying that she was pretty sure that had just been an anxiety attack and that she was okay and that things were basically going to move forward as planned but that she still wanted to see us. I breathed a sigh of relief and was just in awe of this woman. She identifies the battle that the adversary is putting up in her life to try and stop her from this good thing and she doesn't let him get away with it. 

When we met with her we had an awesome discussion about, well about everything. We answered some of her questions and concerns about how the bible supports the Book of Mormon and vise versa and everything. I think she felt a lot better after she left and more sure of her  journey forward.

That night was the Spanish Noche de Fortalecimiento. Santos Came!!! We were so excited. There was an awesome lesson but we couldn't stay too long because of curfew. Some of the members knew that so they wrapped things up in a hurry for us. One of the Members, Marta, gave the closing prayer. A few months ago her daughter was murdered. Recently the family has been going to court to see this man sentenced. Its been so hard on them and especially on Marta. In her prayer she talked about her daughter and had most of us crying by the end. I wanted so much to be able to hold her and comfort her but I didn't have the words in Spanish, so all I did was walk over and hold her hand. I couldn't say anything, but all that needed to be said was communicated just by holding her hand. It brought back a lot of memories of when people had just held my hand through the week of David's accident. I don't know why I am sharing all this, maybe because its just another testament to me of how I have been prepared to be here on my mission at this time. 

I am going to skip strait to Sunday. Sunday, the day of the baptism! Exciting! Church was great, Gjina was there and even her sister, who has previously been a little, well less than supportive, came. After church was all the running around trying to get the final preparations in place but we did it and everything was ready to go when Gjina got there. It was so so special. The only words that came to mind as I watched Gjina enter the waters of baptism and emerge again a new creature, born of God, were, "And now behold, my joy is full." I felt an overwhelming feeling from the spirit of approval and peace. Our Father was pleased. And Gjina was smiling! She made it! O man, it is such a difficult feeling to describe. It was so so special.

Family... this week has been so great. Sorry this email is so long. 

Something really special that happened this week. It happened during Zone Conference, during the testimony meeting. I realized that something miraculous has happened. From the beginning I have been telling everyone that the reason I came out here was because God told me to... which is true... but I realized for the first time in that meeting that the reason I am staying out here is because I want to be here. I want to be here! I didn't think that would happen for a long long LONG time. I thought it would take my whole mission! But its started to happen just 2 months in. I still miss home but I know that this is not just where I am supposed to be but where I want to be. Its a pretty cool thing.

I can't believe all the things that are going on at home. Jacob... seems like time is flying by! You are going to be a missionary before you can blink. How are you feeling? I am so proud of you. I wish I could be there. I wish I could have helped you prepare and see you get your Eagle. I am SOOO proud of you! When I read Dad's letter this week I started to cry. Jake! You are going to the Temple. My heart soared with Joy. It is such a special place. and yes.. I will be in the temple on the same day. Saturday March 23, we will be in the 9:00am session which means 7:00am your time. What time are you going through Jake? As I sit in the celestial room my thoughts and prayers will be focused on you. Don't be scared. Just relax and take in what you can, and then go back as much as you can. I came to love the temple while I was in the MTC and got to go every week. It is such a special special place. I am so happy, excited and proud of you!

I am glad that things are working out for the family. It sounds like the Lord is taking care of you, I know I should just know that but its good to hear. I worry about you guys because I love you and just want to know that you are okay. 

I have to go. Brother Beal needs his computer. Haha. I have taken a good long while to write this email.

I love you all!

I miss you!

-Hermana Maren Hale